Mantipula

Who am I?

2010-02-18T21:26:00.001-08:00

I am convinced I have several men fighting inside me. Some days, I am the workaholic; on these days, I have an overwhelming urge to succeed in my classes and at my job, striving for an elusive sense of accomplishment. On other days, I am the Epicurean: a carpe diem mentality consumes me, and in these moments, I only want to spend time with friends and enjoy my life. On my less ideal days, I am the pessimist. I detest completely any sort of responsible task, and I want to sit in my room by myself and mope. Lastly, on my best days, a sporadic spiritual sojourner in me yearns for righteous Christian living and for a deep relationship with God.

I could summarize my life as being continual exhibitions of my paradoxical personalities, with the one honorable man inside me, the sojourner, consistently ostracized from this internal community. It is as if I am driving a roundabout, exiting and reentering with no sense of direction, while I ignore the beautiful landscaping in the center. I rarely am the spiritual man that I truly desire to be.

I am convinced the “carnal” men inside me are in collusion against the sojourner. When I am not over-consumed with job performance or education, I am living the spontaneous collegian life, eating and hanging out and spending money without any sense of consequence. Once I realize I have not received the emotive recompense I so desired from these philosophies, I withdraw into a mild state of depression that lasts until the next thrill or shallow sense of fulfillment comes along. It is as if, as either the workaholic or the Epicurean, I am looking to the other personality as the godly, righteous way, yet I know innately that true fulfillment comes through submitting myself to God.

I am a living contradiction.

Writer's block

2010-01-16T15:30:00.000-08:00

So blank. So thoughtless. So impersonal.

I stare at the blank screen before me. I was about to read my Bible, but I perceived that subtle itch in my head, the vague compulsion that taunts me at the worst times but escapes me at the most inactive, telling me I need to write--I have to write. What about? I say. And my other self, the one who is so imaginative, so dreamy, does not respond.

Where does he go? I wonder. He is never there when he promises to be. He lures me with ambiguous tauntings, yet when I succumb to his bribes, I see just a mere wisp, a distant memory of his wild imaginings.

He promises much.

I have gone to great lengths to capture him, to place him in a cage and to corral his circumlocutory ramblings, but I transform into a maniac, a crazed scientist unraveling incomprehensible linguistic equations in an ubiquitous notebook. My other self stares and laughs derisively.

"Yes, I write," I pompously tell the friendly conversationalists at parties and get-togethers. But the moments the words fall off my tongue, I see him! There he is! prowling around the restaurants and the generous homes, sneering at my unconscious attempts to make myself appear praiseworthy.

I am determined to catch him in the wild and pin him to a wall at the public square. No more will he taunt me with escapable wordings and blank pages. No more will he lure me with longing for elegant expression, then abandon me, leaving me awkwardly babbling, one overly loquacious prattler among a multitude of communicators, everyone talking, everyone saying nothing.

France Update

2009-07-16T04:45:00.000-07:00

Hey all you readers,

I had a second to give an update, so I thought I would. Here in France, we have three short-term teams in right now. One of them is doing a "Bilingual Camp" in the St. Paul church. The other two teams are helping out with ESL in Nice and the Discussion Table on Wednesday nights. Things are busy but in a good way.

If you feel like praying for our ministry here, you could pray that we will have wisdom in how to use the short-term teams to start relationships with people that will continue after the teams and I are gone. Because people here do not trust Christians and because the area is fairly wealthy, ministry here by necessity is relational. With that objective in mind, I am hoping that we will be able to hang out more with the nationals in order to start friendships that continue online and through the mail. We have also started up an open forum Discussion Table in which anyone from the area can come in and discuss current (and classic) issues. However, only people from the church and missionaries have come. So, pray that people would come and that through this ministry, we can establish a network of relationships. If the community has no knowledge of our existence, we cannot even develop a reputation with which to show the love of Christ.

If any of you have any ideas for "relational" ministries, post them please!

In Christ,
Anthony

Tour de France Video

2009-07-06T01:06:00.000-07:00

We managed to catch the Tour de France in Cagnes-sur-Mer yesterday. Here's a video of all the riders passing by.

http://www.facebook.com/v/680230500700

Lance Armstrong Video

2009-07-04T22:50:00.000-07:00

We went to the Grand Départ of the Tour de France yesterday in Monaco, and I shot a video of Lance Armstrong as he flew by. Here's the link:

http://www.facebook.com/v/679989892880

Thoughts on France and materialism

2009-07-04T01:22:00.000-07:00

I figured I should update, because I haven't in quite a while.

I'm a little over the halfway mark in France, and it has been such a great trip so far. It has been humbling for me to learn how to make it another country, and I think I've really begun to realize that I don't need most of the things I think I need back in the States. I've also had to come to terms with a sparse population of Christians.

The Gospel is desperately needed here in Southern France. The people do not want to live to glorify the righteous God because they have everything they need and more. But like the rich fool in Luke 12, soon their souls will be required of them, and their possessions will go to someone who did not earn them.

We can't take our belongings with us into eternity.

This is the message I want to get out to French people and Americans. God's message is real, and it is relevant now. We either treasure Christ on earth and, in so doing, worship and enjoy the glorious, all-satisfying God for eternity, or we make gods of our pleasures on earth and worship our puny, incapable selves for eternity.

I pray that you treasure Christ.

Made it to France

2009-06-12T10:45:00.000-07:00

I made it safely to Saint-Paul de Vence, France and have been spending time with James Arnold, the pastor of the International Baptist Church, and others. We will have a number of short term teams coming, and things for me are going to get busy soon.

Belated blog post from France

2008-06-30T02:19:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting in Torie's apartment in the old town of Nice, France. We are leaving in a few days. The trip has been amazing (although it is not over yet), and I'm really glad I've been able to come here.

The philosophy of the trip was to meet people so that we could hang out with them and share Christ's love with them, so it has been a lot more relaxed than other mission trips I have been on. Typically, we start our days by trying to meet people in cafés, and then doing some type of ministry in the afternoon, or hanging out with the people we've met. Also, we have been going to beach parties held by the International Baptist Church and have been helping out with ESL classes.

Collectively, we have met a wide range of people. So far, we have met (and I'm sure I'm misspelling names)...

Nicolae, a Frenchman with Italian and Spanish heritage (I think) that works in a boulangerie (a bread shop)
Damien and Harmony, a French couple that recently traveled to NYC to work in their uncle's restaurant
Garie (sp?), a French hotel employee that competed in the Ironman triathlon that we saw 2 Sundays ago
Omar, an African who we played drums with on the beach
Two Egyptian men coming to France for work, whose names escape me

We also met many more people that I can't remember right now. This list also does not include the people we met from the churches.

I'd say that we are completing our goal of meeting people for the purpose of sharing Christ's love. We have been able to share the gospel and tell people what we are here for. Once again, I'm so glad that I have been able to experience this culture and live in France like a Frenchman.

Nice, France

2008-06-18T02:25:00.000-07:00

Hello all, I don't have much time, but I just wanted to say that we arrived safely in Nice. It is a beautiful city, and I'm so thankful to be here. Hopefully I can update more later.

The Obligatory Summer Room-Cleaning...and the Gospel

2008-06-11T22:35:00.000-07:00

I decided to clean my room today so that I could look forward to coming home after my France trip. I quickly waxed nostalgic as I stumbled across some creative writing stories and poems from my high school senior year, 2006. It is so awe-inspiring to consider the post-graduation transformation that has happened to everyone from my school. Although I went to First Baptist Academy, and I was very naïve to think that most people in my class were authentic Christians.

After graduation, many from my school completely repudiated Jesus, finally throwing off the beliefs that had been "forced" upon them. They never had a genuine relationship with him in the first place. Some from my school became pathetically bland Christians: going to church and talking Christian, but not being transformed by the gospel of Christ. And very few of us became radical Christians. Very few FBA graduates live day-by-day at the throne of God, praising him for his majesty and being deeply satisfied in him. I desperately hope that I am one of these few.

My story is unbelievable, how I morphed from an exasperated "FBA Christian" into a child of God totally dependent on him for my well-being. My focus was once so much off Christ; I tried lots of things to repair the gaping hole in my life--materials, music, popularity, girls, sports. I always knew that I could only find happiness in Christ, but I wanted the credit of finding it myself. Yet through Denton Bible Church and the accountability, fellowship, and discipleship that God has provided through it, I am learning how to be satisfied in God. I haven't become perfect by any means--and I won't in this life--but I am learning how to be brokenhearted about my sin and joyful about my salvation through Jesus Christ.

God should have struck me down years ago. But he didn't. He gave me life.

Destination: France

2008-06-01T19:57:00.000-07:00

Two weeks from now, June 15th, I am flying to Nice, France with a team from Denton Bible Church. We will be helping the Arnolds and the Orozcos establish a ministry there, and will stay for three weeks.

A flurry of support raising
My life since January has been a flurry of support raising for first my LA trip and now my France trip. I have thought that there was no way I could raise all the money I needed. Yet God proves himself again and again.

A week before the halfway deadline for money, I had almost no support. I had sent out letters around five weeks before, and I had practically no response. So, while praying earnestly, I began frantically calling potential supporters. Within a week, I had received the exact halfway amount!

Last May, I rode around Denton on my bicycle so that I could drop off support letters. It was so encouraging to see my friends expressing their support and promising their prayers. I truly know now that my friends are behind me.

I am now past the deadline for all the money, but that's not a problem, because I still have two weeks left. I don't have much left to raise, and I am confident, yet prayerful, that God will provide the money.

Today, I was presented at my sister's church, Four Winds, for my France trip. They took up a love offering, which pushed me even closer to my goal. Their support was tremendously encouraging. Now I have a support base in Royse City, Texas. If anyone from Four Winds is reading this, I want to thank you deeply for your support. Your church's giving spirit reminds me of 2 Corinthians 8:3-4, where Paul says, "For they gave according to their means, as I can testify, and beyond their means, of their own accord." Thank you.

Parlez-vous français?
Preparing for this trip has given me a desire to learn French. Occasionally, when I have had the time, I have taught myself the language, but now that I am neither working nor going to school, I am putting a lot of effort into learning conversational French. I know I won't even be proficient in two weeks, but at least I'll be able to ask where the toilet is.

(I created a nifty little Java program to quiz myself on vocabulary. This program is so useful that I think I will use it for any class down the road, including when I take French in the fall. I could even sell it.)

In the past few months, I've developed an itching desire to learn languages, and I'm excited to use that desire for God's glory. I can already see how God is using this upcoming France trip to mold me into what he wants me to be.

About the blog
I plan to update this blog regularly now. I like writing and the Internet too much to not be a blogger. I once had a conversation with Steven Wilbur (also going on the France trip), and he remarked how a lot of Christian bloggers just look like they want to "flex their spiritual muscles." I agree with him completely. I've written a lot of lofty, prideful spiritual Facebook notes.

However, I love writing, the Internet, and good conversation. And, I love God. What better outlet mixes all four? Yes, I do have a problem with pride, but the positive, God-glorifying ramifications of blogging are just too great to ignore. God can work through my sinful desire for praise, and I need to bring this to him every day in prayer.

I hope I can find some readers that will leave thoughtful comments. I want to preach the gospel and glorify God with my blog.

P.S. I will try to update while I am in France, but I can't guarantee that I will.

Truth is not relative to individuals

2008-04-05T13:05:00.001-07:00

Dr. Michael C. Labossiere explains why there must be absolute truth:

In many cases, when people say "that X is true for me" what they really mean is "I believe X" or "X is true about me." It is important to be quite clear about the distinction between being true about a person and being true for a person. A claim is true about a person if the claim is a statement that describes the person correctly. For example, "Bill has blue eyes" is true of Bill if Bill has blue eyes. To make a claim such as "X is true for Bill" is to say that the claim is true for Bill and that it need not be true for others. For example: "1+1=23 is true for Bill" would mean that, for Bill, 1+1 actually does equal 23, not that he merely believes that 1+1=23 (that would be "It is true of Bill that he believes 1+1=23"). Another example would be "The claim that the earth is flat is true for Bill" would mean that the earth really is flat for Bill (in other words, Bill would be in a different world than the rest of the human race). Since these situations (1+1 being 23 and the earth being flat for Bill) are extremely strange, it certainly seems that truth is not relative to individuals (although beliefs are).

http://www.nizkor.org/features/fallacies/relativist-fallacy.html

Kurt Warner Scholarship Follow-Up

2008-04-05T11:44:00.000-07:00

The following is a follow-up e-mail I wrote to First Things First, Kurt Warner's ministry foundation, which gave a large amount of money to our College Life Urban Experience spring break mission trips:

Dear First Things First:

Thank you for your contribution to our trip. I am so glad to have gone on it; it was eye-opening and encouraging, and I am still processing everything that I learned.

My college group from Denton Bible Church in Denton, Texas, traveled to Los Angeles on a five-day mission trip over spring break. We worked with Light and Life Christian Fellowship – North, in Long Beach, and slept in their facilities. The focus of the trip was evangelistic Bible clubs for inner-city children in Long Beach. For three days, our group split into two groups. One group went with a man named Calvin who, in various neighborhoods, did Bible clubs out of a truck; the other group hosted their own club in a grassy area close to Light and Life. I went with Calvin all three days.

It was very interesting to see how the Bible clubs impacted the neighborhoods. I thought that people would be hostile to our efforts; however, many of the parents in the inner-city neighborhoods openly let us borrow their kids for the hour-long Bible clubs. Many of the parents probably were relieved that we would give them an hour-long break from their children, but it also seemed as if the neighborhood viewed the gospel as something that kept kids from learning the violence that is so prevalent there.

I learned many things on the trip, such as how to get over my timidity toward working with children. I also loved taking the gospel to areas that were completely anti-gospel. I have been deeply encouraged by our “counterculture” actions; I am learning that no matter how violent the neighborhood, God is stronger. Psalm 60:12 says, “With God we shall do valiantly; it is he who will tread down our foes.” I can be confident in God’s sovereignty while I am spreading the love of Christ in a violent area.

Lastly, it was encouraging to see the unity and diversity at Light and Life Christian Fellowship. We attended Sunday services, and we saw white, black, Asian, and Hispanic people all praising God and mingling freely. Here in Denton, even in our churches, we are not nearly as diverse as we would like to be. Coming on this trip, I wanted to learn how to flee ethnocentrism, and God sure delivered! The diversity we saw at Light and Life will greatly help us face these issues in our hometown.

Again, thank you for your generous contribution to our LA trip. I learned so much about Christ, the world, redemption, and myself, and I will remember these things as I am growing in the joy and knowledge of the Lord.

In Christ,

Anthony Yates

Thoughts of a Career in Ministry

2008-03-21T19:39:00.000-07:00

When I arrived home from my Los Angeles mission trip yesterday, I grew consumed with the desire to have a global vision. Until I went to college, I grew up in one neighborhood my whole life. I thought of the world only in terms of where I lived. Faraway places were just illusions on TV. I knew they existed, but they could have been a lie for all I knew. When I do not travel, I have a constrained view of the world.

But when I'm flying, looking down at God's earth, I have a broader view of the world.

What is the significance of this? As a Christian, I desire to expand, to globalize, my view. I want to see and experience how the gospel is penetrating the dark parts of the earth.

I subtly feel a calling to travel. Not only do I want to make sure the gospel spreads in Dallas and Denton, I want to see how the gospel is doing in Kenya. In France. In Zimbabwe. Thailand. I want to be a part of Christ's worldwide mission.

Does this mean going into the ministry? Possibly. Does this mean being a missionary? I've never excluded the possibility. As if God is telling me something, I've recently had a growing itch to learn languages so that I can relate with multiple ethnicities.

My high school piano teacher sent me a card for my upcoming France trip, and she ended with a question that interested me greatly: "Anthony, you would make a great minister; have you ever thought of that for your life?"

Yes, I have.